My dad just came into my room and shouted at me in Klingon.
Am I more embarrassed that he did that or that I know he said I was a disappointment to the empire?
You should be most embarrassed that you’re a disappointment to the empire.
I don’t understand american school years what the fuck is a freshman or a sophomore why do you have these words instead of the numbers
what why would you use numbers
so IT FUCKING MAKES SENSE WHAT THE HELL IS A SOFT MOORE OR A FRESH MAN WHY ARE THE MEN FRESH
One time during my freshmen year of college I forgot to do a history paper that was worth 20% of my grade and the teacher didn’t accept late work, so I waited until the professor handed back the papers and angrily asked where mine was. The teacher felt so bad for losing it he let me re-do the entire paper and gave me an A-
You fucking champ
Bill and Tom Kaulitz are identical twins, which is hard to believe sometimes. Instead of having two genetically identical people standing in front of you, it seems more like there are two men standing in front of you who couldn’t be more different from each other. An optical illusion, because as…
U GO MISHA!
I’ve gotten to the point where instead of saying “the garage door needs to open faster” I say “it’s taking forever to load”
the best part is that this is the actual dialogue
The best part is that this is not a metaphor or slang or anything
The best part is this moment.
pro tip: glue a tiny mirror over your drivers license photo so when you hand it to the police they will get confused and arrest themselves instead
i have a degree in criminal justice and i can tell you this works 100% of the time
do you think that one tuesday sam finally lost control and he and dean got drunk and fucked and sam woke up and dean didn’t remember and sam had to smile at the pig-and-a-poke and pretend he didn’t know what it felt like to have dean’s mouth around his dick
I don’t understand why destiel’s haters think that a possible romantic relationship between the hunter and the angel would ruin the relationship between Sam and Dean.
It’s not like when I date someone I suddenly move to Alaska and interrupt every…